Why I can't speak Spanish

There is nothing more confusing for people than Latinos who don't speak Spanish. Yes, this is a possible combination. Latino means that you are descended from Latin American peoples, while Hispanic means that your first language is Spanish. By all means, I should speak Spanish. But at the time I was acquiring language, my Mexican-American father was learning to speak English, so that was all he spoke. My family called him "Notebook Man" because he carried around a pocket memo pad and wrote down new words. Today, he is fully fluent in English and I speak Spanish only well enough to impress the Americans and make the Mexicans giggle. Let me not start on the jobs I would be qualified for if only I were fluent in Spanish. When you send out a resume with the name Angelina Vaquera on it, people are going to make assumptions. Once, I went to a first appointment at a doctor's office and the receptionist gave me intake papers in Spanish. I actually filled them out for a few minutes before I realized what I was doing. Sometimes I meet another Latino who doesn't really speak Spanish either. We take a look at each other and then try to make introductions in our terrible Spanish. It only truly bothers me when a Hispanic person needs my help and I can't translate well enough. I feel like that really realistic looking plastic fruit that tempts people and then disappoints.